Dear Jack,
I met my current boyfriend through a mutual friend about a year ago. We really connected instantly and a couple months later we started a romantic relationship and have been together happily ever since. In the early part of our relationship, we kept it under wraps just to be private, but as soon as "this" friend found out she literally stopped calling, or emailing me. She has a boyfriend & is practically engaged, and I am just not sure why she is mad. My boyfriend was the one to tell her about a month and half ago and apparently they're still friends. So my question is "why is she being such a bitch, & should I bother with the friendship?" We are bound to run into each other, at a party or something...
Sincerely,
Why do hetro, female friendships Suck?!!!
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Dear 'Why do hetro, female friendships Suck?!!!',
If She has not informed you of why she might not approve of relationship between you and your boyfriend, then it doesn't and shouldn't matter to you. Our healthiest friendships and relationships stay that way I believe because we trust in them enough to speak honestly on how we feel about them and any conflicts that should arise. So firstly, Whatever her problems are with the relationship, If she is not a "friend" and woman enough to confront you with her issue, then It's not worth your attention or your boyfriend's attention. She is the one with issue, not you.
However, with all that said, there does seem to be some hidden history going on.. something lurking beneath obviously, between her and your boyfriend. It could be that she had a thing for him a long time ago or she might not think you are suitable for him. I am curious as to why you guys were private for a while and whose idea that was. It could also be strong possibility that she feels a bit betrayed because you two kept it secret for a little while. Whatever the case the more you stress about it the more it becomes an issue. So.. no, I would not care what she thought or further dig into why she is giving you the silent treatment any further than asking her once, Is there any issue you have between you and I? Do not ask her if she has any issue with you and your boyfriend. In the long run all three of you are adults and you have the hand to play this as neutral as possible. You snagged him and she has a man anyways. Whatever combination of issues she might have... You have the guy. When you run into her at parties and events, say Hi and smile and keep moving forward. Chances are highly likely her relationship isn't all that tight if she does have any time to waste thinking about yours. The reality is that you are happy with your man. Do not allow her issues to spill over into your relationship. It most likely that is what she wants. Mentally erect a wall, and hopefully time will wear her down. I personally would no longer ponder why she is acting the way she is. Allow her to act this out in isolation.
Hopefully that helped you, Babe. All the Best wishes.
Sincerely,
JK
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